Need a laugh?

Okay, like you I don't have time to read everything although I do try. I mean I check on the New York Times, Washington Post, the Onion, Star Tribune, Pioneer Press, and others. There are lots of articles that get by me. Then there are lots of comedians I like that I can't keep up with such as Will Durst or Lewis Black and can't keep up with their comments. I tried to always read Molly Ivins, but dang it, she died and I'm quite sad about that.

Then I stumbled across this. Pretty dang hilarious. Yet you can read for yourself.

Look, I find Brittney Spears and the triple run through rehab as funny as anyone. Add shaving her head and tattoos and no comedian could have thought that up. Yet, I also have to say, its sad. She's at the point where she's pretty vulnerable, and it sure appears like the people around her keep trying to do the right thing. They've got to know more than us, and if they think rehab is the right thing, I'll bet it is. The sad part is there are kids involved. I'm sorry, I don't see the Fed-ex as an outstanding father. He did abandon the kids he had with another woman to marry Britney. Man couldn't you see that train wreck coming. And now he seems to be the most adult?

Sorry if I'm a cynic, but I see it as a clear way to make sure the checks are coming in. I also tend to agree that kids should be with their mother unless they (the parents) think otherwise. Yet, you can't put them with a mom melting down. I just think that everyone is a loser in this situation.

Dick Cheney for Lunatic!

Man, Dick Cheney. How does that man sleep at night? How does he actually utter the words he does on tape, on television without going home and blowing his brains out like Vincent D'Onofrio in Full Metal Jacket. If you haven't seen at least excerpts of his interview with Wolf Blitzer, you can at least start with the parts used by Jon Stewart on The Daily Show and you can find them here.

I love the part where Wolf asks about Dick's lesbian daughter and how she's expecting a baby and how the core supporters of his ticket and party think such people (not white married heterosexuals with white color jobs and regular church attendance) should be burned at the stake and are the complete ruination of this country. What poppycock. Hell one of them wants to be the next president and "Put God back into this country." May the Lord save us. Of course Dick gets all indignant on Wolf and of course the whole point is aren't they all someone's daughter, aunt, sister, mother or relative? If we only just treated them like we're supposed to support them regardless if we agree or not?

How many times can a man be caught on tape saying things like, "We'll be greeted as liberators", and all the other manure he's slung as talking points to keep this country inside a war that wasn't right in the first place. We're adding 25,000 troops, but its an augmentation not an escalation. When a woman gets a breast implant, that's called augmentation when she increases their size. Its a reduction when she has the size reduced. So if its not "stay the course", Dick, is it a escalation or a reduction. Pick one you Dick head.

I can't believe that 99% of this country isn't ready to impeach the pair. I mean we impeached Clinton because he diddled another adult with a cigar and she sucked his dick. Yeah, he lied about it like any self respecting human. He got caught in an embarrassing position. So what. There are not many people that can say they haven't done something stupid and then lied about it. Heck, Jerry Ford who was a damn near God by comparison to either of these two (Clinton or the Shrubbery) used to trip all the time. Hell, Chevy Chase's entire career is based upon it and he's only damn lucky he was in that stupid golf movie Caddyshack. Without that he'd be asking if people want their meal "biggie" sized or not.

So, I hereby nominate Dick Cheney as lunatic of the century. The Chevy Chase of Vice Presidents. Imagine that he ran a company for a time? Can you imagine how screwed up Halliburton must be? What lies can they have swallowed? As the Wallace Shawn (Vizzini) character said in the fine film (for kids or adults) Princess Bride. "Inconceivable."

You Knew It Too

A direct quote of an article from www.thebrushback.com, a sports equivalent to www.theonion.com.

Condi Rice Wondering If NFL Commissioner Job Still Available


WASHINGTON, DC--Condi Rice, frustrated by the continuing crisis in the Middle East and her own failure to secure a cease-fire between Israel and Hezbollah, is wondering if the NFL Commissioner'’s job is still available, according to a report in the Washington Post. Rice was quoted as saying that she "“may have been a bit hasty in taking her name out of the running so early."
"“Maybe I shouldnÂ’t have rejected the idea so quickly,"” Rice told the Post. "“I guess I was a little hasty. Now that I'’ve had time to think about it, I think the NFL Commissioner's job would be an exciting challenge for me. So…is it still available? Is this Roger Goodell guy a shoe-in? Because if he's not, I wouldn't mind throwing my hat in the ring. Condi Rice, Secretary of State. Sounds a lot more impressive than Roger Goodell, random guy in suit, doesn't it? Anyway, let Tags know that I'm through with this Middle East bullshit and ready to move on. These people are nuts."”

For those of you among the stupid, this is humor, ah, fake, ah, no Condi Rice doesn't really want to be NFL commish. Then again, maybe she does, but lost out to the insider suit. I mean like he had a chance to be Secretary of State? The old boys network ain't what it used to be, but it still operates on silly level, don't it?

Wednesday, rode in early to Al's Breakfast in Dinkytown. As Mary said, flyin' solo. That is without my usual compendum of pals. Yummy just the same. Although it is a drag to show up cycle sweaty and the only seat open is next to the grill. Eh, sweat a little more. On that same ride I saw three bunnies in my headlight. All went safely perpendicular and none tried to outrun me. I guess they figured out I was no contest. Rats.

I'm tired of talking about Floyd. Everyone I know, knows I'm a bike geek and seeks my opinion. I no longer know what to think. I liked his story of the hip problem, the bonk, the recovery and thrashing of the field the next day and the ultimate triumph. I thought he was a good yellow jersey wearing kind of guy who had earned it. I just don't believe testosterone would benefit him enough. Then again, I'm no endocronologist. I'm just sick of talking about it. I want it to be over. No matter what, its going to screw up US cycling for years. Must be a loser attitude I have that gee, I can't be President, I can't be CEO, there are smarter, faster, more talented people in the world than me and I should just piss myself and go home and cry or something. Why should I be comfortable in the world where I'm at, when I can cheat to get ahead? What a screwed up mentality I have with this willingness to enjoy what I have, try to obey rules and not burn to have more.

Tour de France - Epilogue

I know you've heard it all before and pundits from Lemond to Armstrong have weighed in. Yet, I'd feel remiss if I didn't throw my two cents into the mix. I'm not looking to convince you of anything, just pose that there are no clear cut answers here.

First, I don't believe Floyd doped. I don't think he took anything stronger than a beer and a shot of Jack Daniels. He's not that stupid. Its pretty foolish for a cyclist of his stature to be using alcohol during such a big race. In my mind especially with the heat level he had to endure. As well as after having such a bad day, which could at some level have been due to some level of dehydration. The reason for me is the tendency of alcohol to contribute to that dehydration. Alcohol draws the moisture out of your system on contact, starting from your tongue and the saliva in your mouth. It continues on down the system. This dehydration is what gives you the hangover in part. For decades I've known that if you drank alcohol, but followed it with a decent amount of water to replenish the moisture you lost, your hangover was less, if non-existent. Yet, with all the stress of being a top flite racer, maybe he needed the depression or relaxation impact of the minor amount of alcohol. I've never been close to his level, so again, this is just my two sense.

Second, that alcohol can change the hormone level. Regardless of the accusations, Floyd did not test "positive" for high levels of testosterone. He tested positive for a high ratio of testosterone to epistestosterone. Fitness experts point out that the average joe, or guys like me have a nearly one to one ratio. Athletes of the caliber of Floyd, who's heart rate and level of body fat and other contributors to metabolism have a higher ratio of upwards of 4 to 1 "T" to "E". This isn't just because the testosterone isn't higher, its also because the episterstosterone is depressed. If you continue to ask your body to produce the wattage needed to propel it on a bicycle up mountains on a daily basis (or run distance, or weight lift or any one of many strenuous exercise) the body makes more "T" to enable it to continue. It also suppresses the "E" for that to happen.

Here are the things that I don't know, but suspect. When an athlete of Floyd's level has a bad day like stage 16, when he just didn't seem to have it, what happens to the excess calories he ingests? Doesn't it become fuel for that next day? And if a fellow is really motivated, what happens to hormone levels along with? Doesn't it seem that a guy unhappy with his performance, almost angry with himself over his day, might just have higher levels of adrenaline and testosterone? Face it, I'm no endocronologist, but don't we expect the levels of an elite athlete to increase under some circumstances? Isn't that a part of what makes them elite?

If you look at the wattage data that Floyd permitted to be released, they weren't extraordinary for Floyd. For me maybe, but not for him. The stage 16 numbers were rather average by comparison, but the awesome stage 17 numbers were simply on the order of values he'd already produced under other similar conditions. So although he astounded his critics, some of that impression was psychological, they just didn't expect him to come back. His coaches knew better. It has happened before.

Didn't a few other racers in the same race have some awesome days, and not test positive for anything? At least two of the mountain stages were more or less won by individuals on long breaks. They just didn't have the crushing lousy stage the day before. Yet they might have not had a very hard day, they may have hid in the pack and conserved. Although it didn't look that way, it is basically what Floyd did in 16, he didn't kill himself, he let others pass, and he rode at his own pace. Survived for another day.

Enough rambling. Time to wait for the results of the B sample, which I fully expect to be identical. Unless the lab screwed up, and I don't believe that. It is possible, but I doubt it. I hope to look out for some more experts to weigh in. I do know that other ratio type results have been tossed out. In other words this result is not always a guarantee of culpability.

Talk About Selective Hearing

Every time I hear the advert for the women's razor called the "Venus" I hear:

I'm your penis,
I'm your fire,
Its your desire.

Wouldn't Freud have fun with that?

The Ride From Hell

Okay, not for me. For Sparky, the WunderBeagle, my part time pet.

I have a Burley cargo trailer that I get groceries in. So I got this bright idea to take Sparky for a ride. Sparky is about 10 years old and he's developing this arthritic hip and he no longer wants to walk very far. Sometimes I've walked him for what used to be a short walk and the last half he's dragging me by the leash. Backwards. Formerly he wants to drag me in the other direction. I use a Halty dog color that goes around his snout like a muzzle, but doesn't prevent him from biting, sniffing, licking, or whatever. It does allow me more control and its because the leash connects just below his snout. Not painful like a choke chain, but he quickly gets the message quickly as to who's the boss.

So, I thought I'd take him for a ride in the trailer behind the QB. He's only 30 pounds and I also have a harness intended for buckling him into a seat belt. So, I use this and I'm able to use the lash points in the trailer to keep him safe so he can look around, even turn around, sit or stand, but not get enough of his hind legs into it and leap out.

He's okay getting in. He sorta looked nervous when I put on the helmet and locked the garage door. "You aren't going to leave me here?" Off we went. I use a mirror on my sun glasses so I could turn my head and see him back there. His tail wasn't exactly wagging, but he didn't seem to be in distress.

I had thought I'd ride to a local coffee shop as they are on the order of three miles away. I went on a weekday afternoon last week, early enough in the afternoon that was very little traffic. When I got there, I noticed he was in a high state of agitation. He was quivering like it was time for shots. Something he dislikes almost as much as his nails being cut. I quickly disconnected him and put him on a leash. I have snuck him inside the shop before and I was hoping that AC would help him mellow out. I got a smoothie and then we sat outside. The entire time he stood and wouldn't relax. Usually he lies down or at least sits when he figures I'm not going anywhere. We've been there before so he knows the routine.

I made the stay as long as I could. I lashed him in, like I had before so he had movement, but not so much I thought he'd leap out. Wrong.

As I put my helmet on, and stuffed the Onion into my saddlebag, he was standing on the ground behind the trailer. I shortened the tie down three times before I got it to work. I had to make it so short he couldn't stand up. If he got his back legs semi straight, he'd leverage and then go into this frenzy shake like he was ridding himself of water. This would generate enough slack to get out of the trailer. Then he'd look at me with this look like, "You moron." Smartypantz.

We made the ride home, as fast as I could, but he wasn't happy about it. Okay, lets call that a short failed experiment, and leave it at that. Here I hoped he be able to enjoy my habit, um hobby, and he doesn't. Bummer for Sparky, and yeah for me too.

Thanks Bob!

Courtesy of Bob Roll, former cycle racer, funny guy, and current OLN-TV Tour day France commentator.

Thanks Bob! I agree.

Bob Roll's 8 Reasons Why the Tour de France Is Better Than the Super Bowl

1. The tailgate party lasts a month
2. Admission is free
3. More than 12 million people watch some part of the Tour in person, compared to roughly 80,000 who get to go to the Super Bowl
4. Bike shorts are sexier than football pants
5. The food is better
6. So is the scenery
7. Men and their machines- no padding
8. More struggle, more pain, more drama

And I'll point out that in #3, most of those 80,000 see nothing, or watch ants play a game.

Catastrophe

If you haven't heard by now, you're not a bike geek.

Sadly for me, I am.

It started five weeks ago in Spain. A raid of some sort turned up drugs, perserved containers of blood, and complicated coded lists. List of 58 riders it was said. Codes detailing that some had paid the equivalent of $50,000 a year. To improve their ability by use of EPO or by modification of their own blood by increasing the number of available red blood cells enabling them to carry more oxygen in their bloodstream. Ah, thanks a lot science. I've no idea, but I'm left to wonder what disease or illness was this technology developed. Someone please tell me that it wasn't developed just for jackass athletes to improve their performance.

Then the information in the last few days got worse. The directors of the sport teams withdrew the names of the prominently mentioned riders. Lets start with Lance's arch rival, Jan Ullrich. Then the man who Lance just couldn't drop in the mountains where the winners are separated from the losers, Ivan Basso. Of the top five remaining after Lance's retirement there were two gone.

Next it was Francisco Mancebo was out as well, and he's speaking of retirement at 30 years of age. There were six others, but they weren't considered contenders. Then the rumors began swirling about as many as another 11. This did not come to be, but one more thing occurred, and it was an entire team.

The Astaná-Würth team was down to five riders with the eliminations. Home of Alexandre Vinokourov, a rider who lived to challenge. At any time at any location, Vino was a threat. And he was a pleasure, because he was willing to risk everything, to expect punishment to achieve. Although he didn't finish as highly placed as others, he was always interesting to see, and I will miss him.

So this is it, right? Should my level of disgust be so elevated (like with my own government and the fools that helped elect them and continue to defend them) that I ignore the rest of the tour? Not. Someone has to win. Everybody has to think they can win now. They all are thinking, hey, I'm five steps closer to the podium, to first, the malliot jaune, the polka dot jersey, some measure of improvement. Do you say, yeah, but. No, its le Tour de France, the greatest race in cycling and there are over one hundred top competitors who want your position. Now is not the time to give up on this race. It will be every bit as exciting.

Who are my favorites? I haven't any. I want them to win me over. I want them to show me who is so full of himself that he leaves the saddle with no regrets. Attacks should be plentiful. Who'll be the team to control the peleton and catch the breaks? I believe there is much excitement to see.

Will I be disappointed if no US riders figure prominentlyly? Not at all. I've followed the tour since Bernard "the Badger" Hinault was fighting with Greg Lemond and against Laurent Fignon. Then it was great just to see Lemond on a team with a contender. When Lemond won, I thought it might be 25 years before I saw another American win. When Lance came along, wow, that was simply icing on a cake I'd not expected to have a piece of. Like the World Cup, I don't think the US has to be the winner at everything. Lets just see now, okay?

I Did It!

Am I the only one with an urge to yell at other cyclist that act like morons?

No, don't answer my rhetorical question. I know the answer, very few of you do, which means it is my problem.

Today I did it. That is not yell. Somewhere along the commute I spotted someone ahead of me. Weaving. You know, every time there are a few spaces where there are no cars, he'd weave toward the curb. Confuses the heck out of cagers. Stupid. But he did hesitate at a stop sign long enough to consider it what shall always be referred to as an "Idaho cycle stop". That's a joke, son. (Reference Foghorn Leghorn)

Then at the one and only stop light in the area he does the truly annoying, I'm making a right hand turn without a signal, no, no, I'm just running the red light since there are no cars coming. See I was only about 4 cagers behind at this point. I was peddling incredibly slowly, so that I might not have to take my foot out of the toe clip before it turned green. Maybe my failure at that was the true source of annoyance?

Probably not. This guy was slow. So he wasn't a hundred yards past the light when it turned green. And those cagers needed to pass the weaving butthead a second time. Asswipe. Dork. Now, I was having trouble getting my foot in the clip, so I didn't catch him. I think I could have. I futzed with the pedal, so I wouldn't. Then if I wasn't close I wouldn't yell. Anything.

The next light turned green as I approached behind a car. So I was able to keep my feet in the clips and ride through it behind the moving snake of cagers. I easily caught up to him, but he was on the sidewalk and I was in the left lane intent on making my left turn toward work. I still held my senses together and didn't yell a thing. Some days I'm actually smart enough. Now if I could only stop thinking the horrible things I want to yell.

Cycling is supposed to be fun, why do I insist on taking the fun out of it, by letting the morons get to me?

Again, don't answer.

Did You Ever?

I feel like Andy Rooney for writing this.

Have you ever done something completely stupid and you should have by rights paid a terribly price for your stupidity, but you some how managed to get away with it?

So I'm cycle commuting home on Friday night. I was first in line at a stop light. There were four maybe six vehicles behind me and I took my lane as there was no place to occupy. I'm kinda leaning over the handle bars. I'd already took a good drink off the water bottle hoping the light would change soon.

Meanwhile a vehicle makes a left turn and goes by. Its one of these suburban white boys all dressed up like Eminem. Complete with heater and headband made from a bandana. I'll bet he had a tragic childhood in New Brighton? Meanwhile the vehicle is an all black SUV with the gigantic 22 inch wheels that look so stupid. Especially when you mix them with the low profile tires that give no shock absorption what so ever. Now the best part was the wheels were gold plated. Gold? Does this vehicle have any practical value what-so-ever?

I mean really who much a pretender can this guy be? Has he a record contract? I'll bet not. Has he resettled here from Compton? I don't think so. Is there any point other than image? It is a vehicle that will never see snow. Maybe not even rain. It sure won't see the rough country that an all wheel drive vehicle is designed for. Yeah, but it has leather interior.

Only here comes where I'm stupid part. I laughed. Yeah that's it. I mean, just from who much this dick head has tied up in his vehicle, you know he's as brain dead as a end table. So I let out a nice loud imitation of Nelson from The Simpsons. You know what I'm talking about, just a loud "Haa! Ha!".

The dolt heard me. Oh, I forgot to mention he's got his windows open so everyone can hear his awesome sound system playing his dope hip hop. What? Did I hit some sort of pause in the sound? He slams on the brakes and starts yelling. First the four letter words. Somewhere in there, I hear, "You better not be laughing." Or maybe it was "laughed at" or "laugh at". I'm not sure, but I responded with, "I just did!" So I began to really laugh. Loud. Like play hoot and howl, and just be an ass. I could hear laughs from some of the other cars. I know he put the car in reverse, but other cars coming along the same way as well as the long line behind me may have made that difficult.

I hit him where it hurts. Hard. Just the same it was incredibly stupid. Yeah, I took peverse pleasure it it. And it was childish as hell. I mean, I already knew the guy was a complete ass wipe. He lives for his image, and its what I care least about. And playing with the mind of someone who doesn't have one, is very foolish. And I should know better.

More Music Reviews

Death By Sexy - Eagles of Death Metal is an okay album, some strong campy ideas at work. The "death by sexy" thing includes a photo of the two members in a semi-kung foo position inside. I can't judge if their sexiness will kill you or not. They have fun, they play their guitars knarly and loud and aren't taking themselves very seriously. I enjoyed it and people that like the White Stripes and other low-fi blues bands should enjoy this.

Flashback - J. Geils - Hey, its your classic "best of". Although gone for twenty years, anyone that's not heard of the Geils band with Peter Wolf at the vocals should. One of those recordings that gets played at hundreds of parties across the nation. And its an example of those bands where everyone in it thinks they are a big part of the success, and it turns out that they weren't. Yeah, the played their bit, but separately they just don't cut it on any level even close to what they achieved together. Peter Wolf has put out some fine disc, but not one song is as rocking as his stuff with J. Geils.

Showtunes - Stephin Merritt - Stephin is so hard to understand. This is really a bunch of showtunes. Not my cup of tea. I can't begin to enjoy this disc. It has some amusing bits, great vocal, rather elegant playing, and really quality stuff. Yet, its nothing like anything I'm familiar with. Maybe it will grow on me? For risk takers only.

Broken Toy Soldiers - the Raconteur - Every bit as good as I anticipated. I've enjoyed Jack White's work both in the White Stripes as well as things he did with Loretta Lynn. This is good fun with a variety of contributions from all the members. Good solid work and it will be great fun to see what else they do next and maybe they'll tour behind this?

Steady State of Confusion

Ride a lot. Don't ride a lot. Hot weather. Dang near frigid weather. Its been a crazy two weeks in my hovel. Work has been rather insane with a demanding customer that buys very little in volume, but when they discover what they perceive is a problem, look out. Not only did they come for a visit with a failed system, they brought a couple of their customer reps along with. What a dog and pony show.

I'm lucky in that the intense autopsy of the device wasn't my job. I've got great colleagues that take care of that. Then the data analysis comes along. How many like this in history? Out of how many? Any like this? After they went back home, some days I got five-seven calls from these folks. Sometimes they'd be on a squawk box and the questions and stuff came so fast I couldn't write it down, so I'd have to do the, "let me see if I got this all straight" before we could end the telecon. I'd have missed something every time. Three weeks later we still aren't done. Normal customers we figure out what is wrong and fix the system and return it in a month. Enough about that noise. Its a good thing I have great people to work with (really, not BS in case they read this).

I am just about to finish up a bike for a friend. He ordered wheels from Chuck's a great clearance house. I've bought stuff from him for years. Okay, so I don't really know if there is a Chuck. They have been good to me. I ended up doing more to the bike then planned like rebuilding the headset. I've just got to put the chain on, lube it, and then install the cycle computer for which I located a battery.

Last weekend I wiped the drive of a computer for my son, Thing 3. It was just lousy with junk. He's used stuff to download music and who knows what else. It wouldn't boot without a pop up saying windows needed to evaluate all the system files for something. I split the drive into two virtual drives and put all his music data onto the second drive. I've also been loading songs onto his iPod. I've now loaded about 140 days worth of songs. He could listen 24 hours a day, and not run out of music before he has to return to school. I hope he enjoys that. I had real trouble loading the copy of Norton Systemworks that I had bought for it. I never did get it to load. I tried using the "safe mode" and other tricks, but no go. I couldn't uninstall either. I had to use a special uninstaller from the Symantec site to get it uninstalled. It then appeared to have hosed up iTunes as I couldn't load any more music. After I reloaded that, all seemed to be okay.

Now, next I've got another bike to work on. I'm going to try to take photos as I build it. Still learning my camera. I've had a vintage Cannondale frame for years. Its absolutely in cherry shape, as in built up, but never street ridden. No dents, no bends, nothing. I'm building it up into a light fast training/race bike for a nephew. He wants to try his hand at riding in a triathlon. Fun!

A reader (Doug) commented that in Idaho it is okay to do a rolling stop. I think that is okay, but in some cases I wouldn't. By that I mean, I wouldn't flaunt it when a car is in view. I don't like to piss them off, and since most cagers are so very ignorant of bike versus motor vehicle rules, why open the question. Here in Minnesota, a vehicle can't pass unless it can yield at least three feet. Very few drivers know this and they love to buzz you when annoyed with you. On hills, around corners, with oncoming traffic. Like its my fault they chose to pass. Thanks a lot, put my life in danger, you morons.

A fellow at work has a very nice Cannondale he bought from a shop I used to work in. Now as he has aged he learns that the classic road bike has the bars too bloody low for a normal person. Uncomfortable. So he spoke to me about it and I showed him the Nitto Technomic in the Rivendell catalog and how it has a double length quill to bring his bars up higher and make him more comfortable. So he calls a few shops locally and they either have no idea what he's speaking of, or quote a wacky price (double!) to order it from Quality (QBP) which happens to be in Bloomington. I started thinking I'd do it for him, but then thought, Duh! and have him call Jim at Hiawatha. Sure enough, Jim has the stem. It didn't take me long enough to make the leap from buying the stem and doing the installation, to sending him down and let Jim do the work. More money in Jim's pocket is a good thing. And it worked great. Jim suggested a very fair price and was a pleasure to deal with. My pal suggested it was a great experience and he likes putting dough down when its someone like Jim across the bench to pick it up. Saved me from another project I'd just procrastinate on!

This is how my week went, in a nice short statement. You have been warned. Personally, I'm grateful its over. 

My new camera...

My new camera. 

This is my new camera. I got it through a program at work. We have a deal through Panasonic. I bought from Panasonic direct less expensive than I could find it anywhere on the web through any catalog sites. It came pretty quickly. The web site suggested that I'd get it in three weeks, but I got it in less than seven days. Pretty cool.

Days later I got my copy of the latest Consumer's Reports and it had a big review of digital cameras broken into three sections; Simple cameras, middle complexity cameras, and Single Lens Reflex (SLR) digital cameras. At first I noticed that not many Panasonic cameras were reviewed. Later when I read the whole article I found that in the first two groups the Panasonic (at list price) was rated as a best buy. It wasn't the exactly model as mine, but another one with slightly different feathers that was the same price. I chose mine because I preferred the features it has over the other one. So far so good, I think its an okay camera, and I'll look forward to use it a lot more. YMMV.

You Know You're Old When

When you are riding a bicycle and lose a race to a rabbit.

And the rabbit was facing in the opposite direction you were at the start.

And you had a rolling start when the race began.

And the race only lasted the lengths of two residential home yards.

And the rabbit makes a complete 90° turn at speed after the second house and is still leading when you lose sight of him behind some bushes.

Only redeeming factor? It did make for a smile that early in the morning. And I guess I scared the beejebus out of that bunny.

Denon Adventure

My new used cassette player/recorder. 

So I saw this advert in Craig'sList. A quality cassette recorder/player for only $40. I haven't had a cassette player for years since I wore out the last one. I've worn out two Sony machines from the late 70s. I have hundreds of cassettes that up until now I could only play in the car player.

Speaking of cars, I'm car free again. My family and a few trustworthy friends know me as an easy touch when it comes to my car. Especially in the summer. I don't use it, so if they need to, it works for everyone. So since last weekend I was without a car.

I discussed this with the owner of the Denon and she was okay with waiting, but I wanted to get it done figuring that way someone else doesn't buy it first. Only trouble is their house was an easy 18 miles away on a direct route. Everyone knows you can't usually ride the direct route on a bike. That is if you value your life. And in this case value the new purchase I'd be carrying in my trailer. Her house was somewhere in St. Paul I wasn't very familiar with. Turns out there was two entirely disjointed sections of the road with the same name. My use of Google Map turned out to be most unhelpful. It sent me to the wrong section.

Start over. I told her I'd be by about 9:30, and intended to leave by 8:00 to be there on time and try to miss the worst of the heat during the day. Of course, as usual I didn't get on the road on time. It was more like 8:20. I'd spent about an hour with the maps trying to figure out the route. It appeared that the best route was to meander over to Lexington and take that south. At some point I needed to get off Lexington to avoid traffic and find my way to their street. I did this and it went okay until I followed Como too far almost into downtown St. Paul. And meanwhile they are doing road construction on Hwy 94 and they are rerouting traffic to a cross street. I don't know how long I waited at that light, but I finished the rest of my water. There was a squad car using some remote device to trigger the light.

At one point I was stopped behind some old gigantic tank of a car at a stop light. After one cycle of the quick light behind the guy, I got the idea that he wasn't moving. So I cycled by slowly and the car was running, the AC on, the windows closed. The guy was nodded out, or dead drunk or simply asleep. Against the steering wheel. He eventually woke up and later passed me. Just really strange considering it was like 9:30 in the morning. Maybe it was early for him?

I rode the entire length of the their street (or so I thought) and realized that I wasn't even close to their street address. So I finally pulled out the cell phone and called them. I apologized for being late and asked if I wasn't keeping them from something. Turned out I had actually gone too far. They lived close to Lexington and Grand and I wasn't far off. So, with his added directions, I was soon at their home and looking at the item. It was in great shape. Some tiny scratches on the top, but all the cords and instructions included. Awesome. I paid them for it and loaded it up in the trailer.

I rode down Grand a bit so that I could find someplace to get a drink. I ended up at an SA and got a couple of liters of Gatorade and a couple of doughnuts. Yum! I just sat in the shade and ate the doneys and drank a bunch of the Gatorade. Then I refilled my water bottles with the rest of the Gatorade and got back on the road. I tried a different route for the most part and got home in a reasonable time.

Total trip was just over 46 miles and about three and half hours of riding. It worked out to a pretty slow 12 something MPH, but reasonable considering I stopped at every light and such. I also spent mcuh time checking the map in my bag. I wasn't exactly lost, just trying to avoid dangerous routes. It was fun exploring St. Paul. It also makes you feel awesome to get out in any winter and do something like this car free. I just love the ability to say, I don't need no stinkin' engines. And I can tell the tales to prove it.

I Stop At Stop Signs

This morning on the commute to work, I was cruising along on Stinson Blvd and stopping at all the stop signs in a residential area and near a private school. There are several stop signs in a short distance. I must be a dope since I stop at every bleeping sign. Other cyclist blow by me on a regular basis. I used to get my blood pressure to skyrocket by getting angry with the morons. I figure when I get harassed by a car, its because there are more cyclist like them then me. My choices are to join them or ignore them. I find it so hard to ignore them, but I'm trying to so very hard.

Today I stopped like any other day. I look at the cars that stop beside me, but only to see if that tell tale blinker is working and I'm about to possibly get cut off. I also look to see if they actually stop to see if they are in that "its all about me" hurry and I should again beware. Otherwise I try to ignore the predominance of SUV versus modest sized cars.

I do always listen for that telltale sound of an electric window. I don't try to figure out if its going up or down, my adrenaline level goes up as I go into avoidance mode trying to prevent the possibility of getting something thrown at me. I've gotten empty cans, cigars, cigarettes, and half eaten hamburgers and sandwiches thrown at me. Sometimes its just the invective that spews out the window and I always find it hard not to retaliate in kind so I try to avoid hearing that too. Again, avoidance maneuvers are on order.

So, I do a track stand at a stop sign and a car is beside me. I see it is blue, and the turn signal is not on. I go through the intersection like normal about the same time as the car. The car does not zip past me and my senses heighten. Then I hear that window motor and I stand on the pedals ready for anything. As the window goes down I hear what I think is talk radio. Great, some conservative right wing nut. And I hear that first word I always expect to be followed with the insults. "Hey!" I resist looking, its bad to make eye contact. So the guy continues, "Did you know I was a copy next to you?"

Now I look. It is an Officer in uniform in unmarked squad car. I tell him no, I stop at stop signs because its the right thing to do. He yells, "Great job, keep it up!" I figure this is the end as the window goes up and I realize the radio is radio chatter from a squad car not talk radio.

Several blocks later, there seems to be a significant snarl to traffic. I hang with the car I'm next to, and don't piss the cars off by blasting past. When I get to the cause its my cop, along with three others running speed checks. Speed limit is 30, and it appears under 35, you get a warning. At some point they hand out pre-printed, pre-signed tickets. The cop walks in front and writes the license number, gets the drivers license, runs it through a car thing on his belt and the ticket is set.

I love it.

Button for today. I first heard this comment on a Simpsons' show. Bart says it, and I don't remember why. It appeals to me for this reason: I do not find clowns funny or amusing. The one word I consistently associate with clowns is EVIL. As in Stephen King's It evil. And since I have plenty of trouble sleeping clowns are as good a source to blame for my struggle as anything. Done. Happy Friday? 

Anonymous? Maybe not

Someone left an anonymous comment. I didn't mind the comment or the opposing opinion regarding Neil Young's latest record. They were polite or non-threatening and didn't use any foul language.

Still, I don't like the ability to hide who you are and leave comments.

So, I've turned that feature off. Sorry. Register and show yourself or go away. If you feel strongly enough to leave a comment at least own up to it. If I read your blog and saw something worth commenting on, I would.

Its my blog and its the way I feel. Suit yourself on your own blog.

A Week Ago Shopping Expedition

I got a pal. He is really interested music, even more than me. He owns a couple of guitars (Fenders!), amps (Fenders! tube!), and more recordings than me. Okay, maybe four times the number of recordings that I own. And I own a ridiculous number, no I won't admit to how many. I've been collecting for thirty years and I'm too bleeping anal to toss any away. In desperation I sold a few as well as traded a few. Serious mistake. The really bad ones remind me of mistaken choices, or whom I should never take advice from.

At any rate when Rocking Mr. Tom shows up, we usually go shopping. And when I talk shopping I'm talking the Fetus. An institution in the area for a long time, they have a great selection of blues, rock, and more. I can't speak for country as I can't stand that crap. Okay, I don't mind the quality country; Johnny Cash, Waylon Jennings, and serious old school artists. Not that putz Garth and Wynonna.

So here is the list of what I bought this time. It had been quite a while since I had last shopped for recordings:

Death By Sexy - Eagles of Death Metal
Separation Sunday - the Hold Steady
Flashback - J. Geils
Showtunes - Stephin Merritt
Biggest Prize In Sport - 999
Elan Vital - Pretty Girls Make Graves
Broken Toy Soldiers - the Raconteurs
The Repulsion Box - Sons and Daughters
Songs and Other Things - Tom Verlaine
Dumbing Up - World Party
Living With War - Neil Young

So far I've listened to several recordings, but not enough of all of them. I have listened to these four in depth enough to make a review.

Biggest Prize In Sport by 999 is old school New Wave from the early 80s. I've had a vinyl copy for over 20 years. I loved it then, its pop, its catchy, it has wonderful guitar licks, and its completely meaningless from a seriousness angle. Its a guilty pleasure at its finest. When I saw it in the used bin for $7, I couldn't pass it up. I've rarely seen them in the new racks much less in the used rack. Embarrassed? Nope, its a band which has sentimental value as well as entertainment value. They might be the Bay City Rollers of the New Wave or Punk era, but nobody's hardly heard of them, so maybe its okay? You mileage might vary.

Separation Sunday by The Hold Steady is quality rock and roll with a twist of anger. Some might call it Power Pop or even Punk, but its just all rock and roll isn't it? I heard a cut off this disc on the The Current. The first thing that grabbed me is the vocal similarity to Mark E. Smith of The Fall. I also found the lyric about "your rat faced friend" hilarious. Great biting lyrics about a wide range of stuff. The disc just demands to be played loud. Lots of good crude guitar work and just solid rock and roll. The disc has been well reviewed elsewhere. I find it highly recommended if you like things like the Fall, the Clash, the Jam and other intense music.

Dumbing Up by World Party was a pleasant surprise to see in the record shop in the "new" bin. Its a bit short compared to his (Karl Wallinger of course) other recordings, but it holds up well just the same. If you remember the early days of The Waterboys, then you should consider checking out World Party's back catalog. Personally I suggest you start with Bang! as well as Egyptology. The man has a mind for hooks and catchy lyrics, but he also knows his sound. He always surrounds himself with great players and his recordings sound the same over his 20 plus years of discs. He likes lush production and smooth vocals that may not appeal to everyone. I really have always liked the sound of World Party since Karl was a part of the Waterboys. I thought that was partnership that broke up and each carried a solid portion of the musical ability and later recordings prove that Mike Scott and Karl Wallinger have the chops to carry off their own careers with ease.

Living With War by Neil Young was the biggest disappointment so far. Where was Neil's angst when he made Prairie Wind? I don't know where Neil was, but Shrubbery (its a nickname for George W. Bush by a Texan newspaperwoman you should know even if I can't remember her name at the moment) and his administration have sucked for a long time. I really thought this disc showed Neil's age. Too little, too late. What? The last five or six recordings have left me very unexcited. I don't think I've really enjoyed anything since Arc Weld and before. I expect more from Neil and frankly, I've not found it. Its begun to piss me off. Not bad enough like with U2 where I won't be buying anything new of theirs, but I'll be thinking long and hard before I buy another Neil Young recording. I'm so freaking disappointed.